Halloween is the day when everything scary comes out from hiding.
No, I was not scared by the five year olds running around with fake blood dripping down their faces, or the pre-teens wearing gruesome masks.
I was scared by the validation that today held of some changes that are coming up faster than I want. He's leaving. And today was the last time I'll ever be in his house, his room, as he's not staying there for his last months here.
I don't want him to go.
And unfortunately, despite having spent the day with him, and him giving me some things he didn't want to bring with him when he moves(*cough*rollercoastertycoonforpc!!*cough*), the scared feeling that this is just one more step in the process is lingering with me, and I doubt it'll leave soon.
I always cling to my emotions too long, just as I cling to old candy wrappers - claiming that I will one day make art out of them. Maybe I'm a touch too nostalgic, either way I'm scared. And I don't like that.
No, I was not scared by the five year olds running around with fake blood dripping down their faces, or the pre-teens wearing gruesome masks.
I was scared by the validation that today held of some changes that are coming up faster than I want. He's leaving. And today was the last time I'll ever be in his house, his room, as he's not staying there for his last months here.
I don't want him to go.
And unfortunately, despite having spent the day with him, and him giving me some things he didn't want to bring with him when he moves(*cough*rollercoastertycoonforpc!!*cough*), the scared feeling that this is just one more step in the process is lingering with me, and I doubt it'll leave soon.
I always cling to my emotions too long, just as I cling to old candy wrappers - claiming that I will one day make art out of them. Maybe I'm a touch too nostalgic, either way I'm scared. And I don't like that.
photo taken and (c) by me, Katia.
there is a blogger tag awaiting you on my blog :)
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The image of old candy wrappers waiting to be made into art made me really sad.
ReplyDeleteWhat you wrote sounds sad ):
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